In dedication to men

What is the thinnest book in the world? "What men know about women"

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? ONE, men will screw anything

How does a man take a bubblebath? He eats beans

What is a man's idea of foreplay? A half hour of begging

How can you tell if a man is sexually aroused? He's breathing

What's the difference between men and government bonds? Bonds mature

How do you save a man from drowning? Take your foot off his head

How can you tell if a men is happy? Who cares?

How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? We don't know..... it's never happened

How are men and parking spots alike? The good ones are always taken and the ones that are left are handicapped

What is a man's idea of helping with the housework? Lifting his leg so you can vaccum

What is the difference between a man and E.T.? E.T. phones home

What does a man consider a seven course meal? A hot dog and a six pack

What did God say after creating man? I CAN DO BETTER!

What do you have when you have two balls in your hand? A man's undivided attention

What are two reasons why men can't mind there own business? 1)No mind 2)No business

Do you know why men are good lovers? They know first-hand the penalty for early withdrawl

Why are men like laxatives? They can irritate the shit out of you

Why do men name their penises? They want to be on a first name basis with the one who makes their decisions

What gross stupidity? 144 men in one room

Why are men given larger brains than dogs? So they won't hump women's legs at cocktail parties

Only a man would buy a $500 car and put a $4000 stereo in it

How do men sort their laundry? "Dirty" and "Dirty but wearable"

Do you know why men have holes in the end of their penises? So they can get oxygen to their brain

Do you know why men don't like wearing rubbers? Because it cuts the oxygen off to their brain

How is a man like a snowstorm? You don't know when it's coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last