In dedication to men
What is the thinnest book in the world? "What men know about women"
How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? ONE, men will screw anything
How does a man take a bubblebath? He eats beans
What is a man's idea of foreplay? A half hour of begging
How can you tell if a man is sexually aroused? He's breathing
What's the difference between men and government bonds? Bonds mature
How do you save a man from drowning? Take your foot off his head
How can you tell if a men is happy? Who cares?
How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? We don't know..... it's never happened
How are men and parking spots alike? The good ones are always taken and the ones that are left are handicapped
What is a man's idea of helping with the housework? Lifting his leg so you can vaccum
What is the difference between a man and E.T.? E.T. phones home
What does a man consider a seven course meal? A hot dog and a six pack
What did God say after creating man? I CAN DO BETTER!
What do you have when you have two balls in your hand? A man's undivided attention
What are two reasons why men can't mind there own business? 1)No mind 2)No business
Do you know why men are good lovers? They know first-hand the penalty for early withdrawl
Why are men like laxatives? They can irritate the shit out of you
Why do men name their penises? They want to be on a first name basis with the one who makes their decisions
What gross stupidity? 144 men in one room
Why are men given larger brains than dogs? So they won't hump women's legs at cocktail parties
Only a man would buy a $500 car and put a $4000 stereo in it
How do men sort their laundry? "Dirty" and "Dirty but wearable"
Do you know why men have holes in the end of their penises? So they can get oxygen to their brain
Do you know why men don't like wearing rubbers? Because it cuts the oxygen off to their brain
How is a man like a snowstorm? You don't know when it's coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last